The Fateful Poo

When my wife and I first became friends, her son was a little over a year old. As a dedicated and awesome Momma she spent as much time with him as possible.  So when I spent time with my friend I got to spend time with him too. He was an adorable loving little guy so this was no hardship at all.

One day when we were visiting in the afternoon, she told me it was hard for her in her current situation to take longer than a 3 minute shower unless she took the boys playpen and wedged it in the door of the hall bathroom and even then he would be fussy and crying by the time she was half done.

Wanting to help out where I could I told her Hey! I would watch the boy while she took a long hot shower and did a beauty reset. She could use the big master bath and give herself a mini-spa treatment all while knowing we were just on the other side of the house with me keeping the boy occupied and happy. She thought that sounded fantastic and took me up on the offer.

She warned me that they were still potty training and that the boy had gotten the hang of pooping in the toilet but still needed diaper changes occasionally for pee accidents. No worries! I was a pro! I’d helped take care of my niece from infancy to toddler while I was in high school. I could handle a wet diaper or too. Go! I said make free with the facilities. Enjoy! I would be playing blocks and reading stories with an happy and energetic 16 month old.

You know that happy feeling you get when everything seems to be working out for the best and you were the cause of it? Yeah, don’t trust that feeling.

So the boy and I are having a blast. We are building block towers and knocking them down and giggling! Fun times! It had only been five minutes since his mom left the room. That’s when I noticed a smell. I’m like “Little Dude did you fart?” and he’s looking at me all smiling and laughing…then he makes a face and grunts. Wow the smell got strong! Now most caregivers know that smell and the wet sounding farts that go along with it.

I laughed at his timing but I’m thinking how bad could it be?

The answer is bad! Very Very Bad!

I got out the changing pad and put him down on it. He’s happily cooperating as I get his pants undone when I find his second surprise. Yep, diaper blow out! The poo has escaped and is heading down his legs. I grab the baby wipes because dude this is gonna take a few then I begin to undo his diaper at which point he is laughing and giggling and then he grunts a little again.

Well, crap… literally. With the diaper loosened the poo headed right up his back. Into his shirt.

Knowing when to bring out the big guns I picked him up, held him at arm’s length and headed for the hall bathroom with its tub. The good thing was poo was sticky enough that nothing dripped off him. The bad thing was the poo was sticky and nothing wanted to come off him.

The clean up process involved a lot of water, soap and me trying to keep from becoming covered in with either poo or water myself. He was a wiggly little thing! He obviously thought this impromptu shower/bath time was a grand thing. I finished getting him cleaned, diapered and in clean clothes about the time his Momma now finished with her shower and in fresh clothes came to find us.

“Why is he in different clothes?” She asked

I looked at him and said, “So about that potty training…”